Leadership Starts with Knowing Yourself and Your Team
Understanding your team’s workstyles can transform the way you lead. Some thrive on structure, while others need flexibility. Recognizing these differences builds trust, boosts engagement, and helps everyone succeed. Leadership isn’t about control—it’s about connection. When people feel seen and valued, they do their best work.
Lately, I had the chance to work with a team on DiSC Workstyles, focusing on how different communication styles shape teamwork.
Leadership isn’t just about making decisions or setting goals—it’s about understanding people.
Every team is like a puzzle, with each member bringing a unique piece to the bigger picture. Like jigsaw puzzle pieces, individuals have their own nuances. When leaders recognize and appreciate these differences, it boosts engagement and strengthens the entire team. After all, who doesn’t want to feel seen and valued?
Why Understanding Different Workstyles Matters
No matter where we sit in the team hierarchy, recognizing that others think and work differently is important. But for leaders, it’s critical. Without this awareness, it’s easy to overlook the strengths of people who approach tasks in ways that don’t match our style.
“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”
The same idea applies to workstyles. If leaders only value employees who work the way they do, they miss out on the full range of talent, ideas, and problem-solving approaches within their team.
Bringing DiSC into Goal-Setting and Performance Reviews
One of the most effective ways I’ve seen leaders use DiSC Workstyles is by incorporating them into goal-setting and performance reviews. Before sitting down for these important conversations, taking a moment to refresh your understanding of each team member’s workstyle can make all the difference.
Here’s why:
Better Alignment: Knowing an employee’s workstyle helps shape realistic and motivating goals.
Clearer Communication: Understanding how they prefer to receive feedback reduces the risk of misinterpretation.
Fairer Assessments: Leaders can avoid unconscious biases and evaluate performance based on strengths, not just personal preferences.
Small Adjustments, Big Impact
Bringing DiSC into leadership doesn’t mean overhauling your entire management style—it’s about small, intentional shifts that create stronger connections. Some team members thrive on structure and direct communication, while others prefer flexibility and discussion. Adapting your approach to match these preferences doesn’t mean catering to every whim; it means leading in a way that maximizes each person’s potential.
At the end of the day, great leadership isn’t about control—it’s about connection. When we take the time to understand our team, we create an environment where people feel valued, engaged, and motivated to do their best work. And that benefits everyone.
Why Learning Before Assessment
Before jumping into an emotional intelligence (EQ) assessment like EQ 2.0, consider this: starting with learning builds confidence, minimizes overwhelm, and lays the groundwork for meaningful insights. By mastering the basics first, you’ll approach your assessment as a growth opportunity rather than a judgment of your shortcomings.
When it comes to emotional intelligence (EQ), diving straight into an assessment might seem like the logical first step. After all, assessments like the EQ 2.0 are designed to give you a snapshot of where you stand. But as someone who has coached numerous leaders using this tool, I can confidently say it’s not always the best place to start.
The Emotional Toll of Jumping In Too Soon
Let’s be real—nobody likes being told where they’re falling short, especially when it comes to something as personal as emotional intelligence. For some, starting with a psychometric assessment can be a jarring experience. Imagine being confronted with a report that bluntly highlights your weaknesses. It’s like a magnifying glass on areas you might already feel insecure about. This can be quite traumatic, leaving people feeling discouraged rather than motivated.
The Case for Learning First
So, what’s the alternative? I advocate for learning before assessment. Here’s why:
Low Psychological Risk: Learning first allows individuals to explore the basics of EQ in a low-pressure environment. They can familiarize themselves with different EQ scales without the immediate fear of judgment.
Self-Reflection: Even those who aren’t naturally self-aware will start to get a sense of their strengths and weaknesses. This self-guided discovery fosters openness and a willingness to delve deeper.
Foundation Building: Learning helps lay the groundwork. Think of it as building the base before constructing a house. Once individuals understand the fundamentals, they’re better prepared for an assessment's detailed insights.
The Learning Process
During this initial learning phase, individuals can start to:
Reflect on their behaviours: How do they handle stress? How do they interact with others?
Seek feedback: Conversations with friends, family, or colleagues can offer valuable insights into how their emotional intelligence is perceived outwardly.
This gradual approach encourages a deeper exploration, setting the stage for a more receptive and productive assessment experience.
The Power of the Assessment
Once the foundation is set, the EQ 2.0 assessment can be incredibly enlightening. It provides detailed, actionable insights that include:
Comprehensive Results: Each of the 15 EQ facets is broken down with impact statements and strategies for improvement.
Well-Being Indicator: This pulls together aspects like Self-Regard, Optimism, Interpersonal Relationships, and Self-Actualization into a cohesive view.
Leadership Insights: For those in leadership roles, an executive summary highlights their highest and lowest areas, along with leadership impact instructions.
Leadership Potential Summary: This focuses on key areas such as Authenticity, Coaching, Insight, and Innovation.
Avoiding Overwhelm
While these insights are valuable, they can also be overwhelming for someone new to emotional intelligence work. It’s a lot to take in, and without a solid foundation, it can feel like trying to learn a foreign language by jumping straight into complex grammar rules.
A Learning Analogy - Remember the ABC’s?
Think back to when you learned to read. You didn’t start with Shakespeare. First, you learned the sounds of the letters, then simple words, and gradually built up to more complex texts. Emotional intelligence is similar. Master the basics first—understand the building blocks—before tackling the complexities.
In Summary
Learning before assessment creates a more supportive and effective pathway to developing emotional intelligence. It helps individuals build confidence and openness, making the eventual assessment a tool for growth rather than a source of anxiety.
So, take it step by step, and remember—you’re building a skill that will serve you in every aspect of your life.
Why Emotional Intelligence is Crucial for Leadership and More Importantly Personal Happiness
Discover how emotional intelligence can enhance leadership skills and bring greater balance and happiness to your life. It's a skill that grows with you.
In today’s fast-paced world, leaders face countless challenges, from navigating complex interpersonal dynamics to making tough decisions under pressure. While technical skills and cognitive intelligence are undoubtedly important, emotional intelligence (EI) is the game-changer that can truly elevate a leader’s impact.
Let’s explore why emotional intelligence is essential for effective leadership and, more importantly, how it contributes to personal happiness.
Understanding Emotional Intelligence
Emotional intelligence, often abbreviated as EI, refers to the ability to recognize, understand, and manage our own emotions while also being able to recognize, understand, and influence the emotions of others. Unlike IQ, which peaks in our twenties, EI can be developed continuously throughout our lives. This means that no matter your age or stage in life, there’s always room for growth.
Leadership and Why EI Matters
Enhanced Decision Making
Leaders often have to make decisions under pressure, where emotions can run high. Emotional intelligence equips us to stay calm, assess situations objectively, and make informed decisions. By managing emotions, leaders can avoid rash decisions and make thoughtful, strategic choices that benefit their team and organization.
Improved Communication and Relationships
Effective communication is a cornerstone of successful leadership. Leaders with high EI can better understand their team members' emotions and respond appropriately. This creates a positive work environment where employees feel heard, valued, and motivated. The ability to empathize and connect with others also helps in resolving conflicts and building strong, trusting relationships.
Increased Flexibility and Resilience
In the face of change, flexibility and resilience are key. Leaders with strong emotional intelligence can adapt their thoughts and behaviors to dynamic circumstances, maintaining a positive outlook even when faced with challenges. This resilience not only helps leaders navigate their own stress but also inspires their teams to persevere and remain hopeful.
Personal Benefits: EI and Happiness
Beyond the workplace, emotional intelligence plays a significant role in personal happiness. Here’s how:
Stress Management
Life is full of unpredictable events, and how we handle these stressors can greatly affect our well-being. Emotional intelligence provides tools for managing stress, such as recognizing when we’re feeling overwhelmed and employing coping strategies like mindfulness, exercise, or seeking support. By keeping stress at an optimal level—after all, we need some stress for motivation—we can maintain a healthier, more balanced life.
Optimism and Positive Outlook
Optimism, a key component of emotional intelligence, involves maintaining a hopeful attitude even in the face of setbacks. This positive outlook can lead to greater life satisfaction and happiness. Practicing gratitude, reframing negative thoughts, and focusing on what we can control are all ways to foster optimism and enhance our overall mood.
Better Relationships
Emotional intelligence helps us understand and manage our own emotions, which in turn allows us to better connect with others. Whether it’s with family, friends, or colleagues, strong EI leads to healthier, more fulfilling relationships. When we communicate effectively, show empathy, and manage conflicts constructively, we create deeper connections and a sense of belonging.
Conclusion
Emotional intelligence is more than just a buzzword; it’s a vital skill set that can transform both your professional and personal life. For leaders, EI fosters better decision-making, enhanced communication, and greater resilience. On a personal level, it contributes to stress management, a positive outlook, and stronger relationships, all of which are crucial for overall happiness.
By committing to developing your emotional intelligence, you’re not only investing in your leadership capabilities but also paving the way for a more fulfilling, balanced life.
Preparing for Retirement: Designing Your Next Chapter
Most people think of retirement planning as crunching numbers—savings, investments, budgets. But what about your life after work? Retirement isn’t just an exit from the 9-to-5; it’s the start of something new.
Imagine waking up each day with purpose, pursuing passions, and enjoying meaningful connections. Retirement Picture and Frame helps you prepare for this transition, focusing on both your vision and the financial foundation to support it.
What does your ideal retirement look like? Let’s start planning today! #RetirementPlanning #LifeAfterWork #NewBeginnings
When people think about retirement planning, they often focus solely on finances—savings, investments, pensions, and budgets. While these are important, they’re just one part of the equation. The other key piece? Imagine what your life will look like after work. What do you truly value, and how do you want to spend your time day-to-day? Now how do your finances fit with this vision?
Retirement isn’t just about leaving your job—it’s about starting a new chapter. It’s an opportunity to redefine your purpose, create fulfilling routines, and strengthen relationships.
“Retirement Picture and Frame” will help you prepare for this life transition.
Why Readiness Matters
Retirement can feel like a mixed bag. On the one hand, it’s your chance to relax, pick up new hobbies, and spend more time with loved ones. On the other, it can bring challenges like uncertainty, loneliness, or even a loss of identity.
Here’s the good news: retirees who take time to envision their future beyond finances often report higher levels of happiness and fulfillment.
Creating a clear vision can help you confidently embrace this new phase of life.
When to Start Planning
It’s never too early—or too late—to begin preparing for retirement. Ideally, start about 10 years before your target retirement date. This gives you enough time to gradually adjust your lifestyle and finances, ensuring a smoother transition.
If you’re closer and haven’t started yet, don’t stress! Taking small, actionable steps now is better than doing nothing.
Every effort counts toward shaping the retirement you want.
Picture Your Retirement Life
Imagine your ideal retirement. What does a perfect day look like? How do you spend your time? These answers form your “retirement picture,” reflecting your values and goals.
Your vision might include pursuing passions, exploring new hobbies, volunteering, or deepening relationships.
Having this clear picture will guide your decisions and help you focus on what truly matters.
Frame Your Financial Plan
Your financial “frame” is the structure that supports your retirement picture. By organizing your finances, you create a stable foundation to bring your vision to life.
We’ll start by gathering essential financial information which will help you identify gaps or adjustments you might need. This will help you make informed decisions that align with your goals.
A New Beginning
Retirement isn’t the end of the road—it’s the start of an exciting new chapter. With thoughtful preparation, you can ensure it’s filled with joy, purpose, and fulfillment.
Take the time to design your “Retirement Picture and Frame”, so your future reflects the life you’ve always dreamed of.
Raise your hand if you’ve done the one-day course!
Remember that all-day training with the untouched workbook? How much stuck—and how much have you used?
Enter Learning Sprints: short, focused sessions that break big topics into actionable chunks, helping you learn, apply, and grow in meaningful ways.
It’s the growth that’s important, not the certificate.
You know the six-hour, all-day learning opportunity—the one with the workbook that’s still sitting on the shelf, largely untouched since the course ended?
Now, think about it: how much of that content do you actually remember? And more importantly, how much of it have you applied?
The human brain is a remarkable machine, but it has its limits. It’s not designed to absorb and retain large amounts of information in one go. That’s where Learning Sprints come in.
What Are Learning Sprints?
Learning Sprints are short, intensive, and hyper-focused sessions that break down larger topics into manageable chunks. Here’s why they work:
Reduced cognitive load: By tackling smaller pieces of information, your brain processes and retains knowledge more effectively.
Focused attention: Short sessions allow you to stay fully engaged, without the fatigue of lengthy workshops.
Spaced learning: Learning over time enhances long-term retention and skill mastery.
Application-based: You can immediately apply new skills between sessions, deepening understanding and increasing confidence.
Take emotional intelligence and the Bar-On model, which includes 15 key elements. Instead of spending six hours on all 15 at once, a Learning Sprint dedicates one hour to three related elements. This focused approach enables learners to:
Dive deeply into each element.
Reflect on how to apply their learning in a specific area.
Take actionable steps to develop skills before the next session.
By applying what you learn in real time, you’re not just ticking boxes—you’re evolving in meaningful, measurable ways.
CLS Connection courses leverage Learning Sprints to help learners achieve practical results. Each session is designed to support application, reflection, and growth, ensuring that participants move the needle forward instead of simply adding another certificate to their collection.
Because at the end of the day, it’s not about how many courses you’ve taken—it’s about how much you’ve grown.
My Why . . .
My why . . .it all started in 2019
So, what’s all the fuss about emotional intelligence? Why am I so passionate about it? Let me take you back to 2019 when I coordinated a management growth program. The agenda included all the usual suspects: Finance (yawn), HR (tsk tsk), coaching (okay, getting better), and then—emotional intelligence, or EI for short. At the time, I had read a few articles about EI and thought I understood it. But I had no idea just how transformative fully exploring it would be.
Fast forward to the program itself, and BAM! It hit me like a perfectly timed meme—EI wasn’t just a "nice-to-have" skill. It was life-changing. Over the course of coaching nearly 100 leaders, emotional intelligence emerged as the secret ingredient transforming personal and professional lives—including my own. I witnessed teams bond like never before, marriages strengthen, and even parents discover new ways to connect with their kids. Powerful stuff!
As a mom of two (then teenagers, now adults), that last one hit home on a whole new level. Let’s be real—parenting is basically a 24/7 emotional intelligence boot camp. You need the patience of a saint, empathy that could melt stone, and resilience strong enough to rival a superhero’s cape. The more I explored EI, the more I realized it wasn’t just for the workplace. It’s a survival kit for life—helping you navigate everything from toddler tantrums to life’s biggest curveballs like stress, change, and loss.
About a year ago, I got serious and created a workbook to help translate the emotional intelligence principles I’d learned through facilitation training and coaching into a practical, user-friendly tool.
My goal? To empower anyone to apply these principles with ease and confidence.
Picture this: bite-sized learning bursts designed to help you explore your inner world (without triggering a midlife crisis), all built on the Bar-On EQ 2.0 model. Best of all, it’s a repeatable system—so when life throws you a curveball, you can catch it like a pro.
For me, this work isn’t just a job—it’s a passion. Helping others thrive by strengthening relationships, managing life’s inevitable chaos, and unlocking personal growth they never imagined is what drives me.
Likewise, emotional intelligence isn’t just a skill; it’s your ticket to navigating life’s challenges with grace—and maybe even a little humour.
